IF THE HEADLINE IS BIG ENOUGH, IT MAKES THE NEWS BIG ENOUGH

PISS

BIG TOP

There has been local consternation that a circus has recently set up camp on Wirral which features live animals.

SEE HERE

There appears to be some dismay that the council should have intervened and put a stop to it. To which we can only say that considering that Wirral Council have a chequered past when it comes to the treatment and welfare of vulnerable people that it was highly unlikely that the treatment and welfare of animals should concern them.

Moreover we think circuses and Wirral Council have a natural affinity as jugglers,illusionists and clowns appear to be responsible for running the show.

BIG REPORT/BIG DELAY

As our follow up to our Lessons Have Been Adjourned story just to let you know that the Audit & Risk Management meeting has gone from being reconvened for this week to tba (to be arranged) / cba ( can’t be arsed) to now being held October.
“Yes but did they specify October of which year ” sniped Her Ladyship.

This decision was taken backstage by Councillors and carefully concealed from public scrutiny after what a number  of sources describe as “bullying”.
“Plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose…” sighed Her Ladyship.

Now we know it’s a big report but are Councillors hoping that they can pull the traditional  “Star Wars Card” out of the pack and claim the shenanigans all happened  “a long time ago in a galaxy far,far away” ?.

As a public service to assist Councillors with their deliberations Miss Snoop has applied her forensic skills to the report and we will be publishing ” BIG/ISUS For Dummies” shortly.

BIG OVERSPEND

We understand that Lib Dem Councillor Stuart Kelly has called in a Council decision concerning cuts to funding of projects in other departments as a result of yet another Department of Social Services (DASS) projected big overspend.

Although it must be said that the Council cabinet minutes are an absolute masterclass in obfusaction so it becomes a case of when is a £3 million projected overspend not a £3 million projected overspend?.

The minutes record that DASS Director Graham “Son of Bill” Hodgkinson “set out that there was a projected potential budget variance reported on behalf of Adult Social care in the finance report of £3M .
The figure of £3M that had been reported was not as yet an overspend. It was derived primarily from a financial perspective that all of the benefits of the projects may not be deliverable in year”.

Meanwhile the Cabinet resolution states:  ” it be noted that at Month 2 (May 2014), the full year forecast projects a gross General Fund overspend of £3,137,000…”

SEE HERE

And so it’s a case of robbing Peter to pay DASS to reduce the projected overspend which Cllr.Kelly (and other Councillors) have objected to.
At least DASS should be congratulated in ‘fessing up and not rolling over the toxic debt into the next financial year and the one after that and the one after that etc; etc; as low friends in high places allowed them to do for many years.

Talking of which and finally ……….

BIG HITTERS

News filters through of a recent incident involving a high ranking civic dignitary and their companion who were involved in a very public “difference of opinion” when seemingly “tired and emotional” after a civic reception.  We understand that conduct unbecoming of people of such high standing has been the talk of Hurst’s Bakery and Houlihans…….

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3 thoughts on “IF THE HEADLINE IS BIG ENOUGH, IT MAKES THE NEWS BIG ENOUGH

  1. Can we have a “Working Wirral for Dummies” too?

    PISUS 1 through to PISUS 3
    covers £6 million and 5 pee
    Will we ever tell the story
    When the winter frost begins
    When the nights are cold and hoary
    Contracts have not long been seen
    Nor outputs, nay nor profit
    For those that Wirral do inhabit
    Do tell this tale for all our sakes
    With ale . hot punch and honied cakes
    Tell tales of Kevin Adderley
    To rival those of Waverley
    We shall all shout “Great Scott”
    This is most peculiar a plot
    to waste so great a sum of cash
    And none are punished nor feel the lash
    I wish to join those Excellencies
    Pray have you any of those vacancies?
    I wish to sit beside the Burgess Khan
    and chant “none are to blame save none”
    Until my pension I in sacred song
    None to blame. there is no wrong!

  2. I’m from Liverpool no time for Local politicians like Joe Anderson, but bloody hell reading this site I can actually understand why he’s annoyed at having Cllr Phil Davies appointed as Mersey side Chair. I mean could you even imagine Wirral Council putting on a Giants Spectacular ? It’d probably consist of a broken Action Man dangling on some knicker elastic whist the Lord Mayor gets pissed at the free bar. Seems Wirral is far more bent and broken than most local authorities. I’ll follow this with interest and tell my mates who work for LCC . Nice one

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