Eulogy for Jimbo



Jimbo gets a cuddly companion to help him through those sleepless nights.


Readers will recall a story we published last month which concerned outgoing Wirral Councillor Jim “Crabby” Crabtree where we reported that in the wee small hours the clearly troubled former Chair of Wirral Council’s Audit & Risk Management Committee implored Dr Robert Smith – an intrepid local champion of public accountability –  to make some enquiries about recent refurbishment costs at Wallasey Town Hall.

After being cast to the wilderness by his Labour Party colleagues and cast aside for a newer and posher interloper in the shape of PR upstart Martin Liptrot(sky)  , Crabtree seemingly saw fit to (belatedly) dish the dirt and describe the refurbishment costs as “absolutely disgusting”.

The postscript to this sorry story is that Dr. Robert did indeed make the enquiries requested by Crabtree .This enables us to learn that the refurbishment costs for Liptrotsky’s office amount to £5,666. Not a princely sum in the scheme of things but the significance for us lies in what it symbolises – that despite pleading poverty the powers that be will always find money for their cronies.

Dr.Robert extends the courtesy of replying to Jimbo (and indeed all Wirral Councillors) with his findings – something that Wirral Council often fail to reciprocate. We think his response printed below serves as a fitting farewell to Crabtree as he slinks off to well deserved political obscurity. We can only hope that he spends some time reflecting on some of the things he was happy to go along with when he was part of a poisonous political cabal and whether it’s hypocritical that he should only start complaining about questionable practices when he’s no longer in a privileged , protected position of power now occupied by the likes of Liptrotsky.       


Dear Councillor Crabtree

Further to your 2.35am early-morning enquiry of 2nd March, I am now able to answer your question. 
I paste in your original email here as a little time has passed in the interim.
“You need to ask how much it cost the council tax payer for the building work on the Members Room not just labour party members but tory and liberal members room for lip trots room refurbishing? absolutely disgusting”
I understand that the original estimate for the work was around £3,000, but I have been advised that the final cost for the building work was £5666.00 (roughly 89% over estimate). 
I do share your concern for this (and other) expenditure of Council Taxpayers’ money for an individual still functioning as an ‘activist’ with a number of potential conflicts of interest, whilst employed in a politically-restricted post. In my opinion, if a political party wishes to benefit directly from a very specific individual’s employment, as opposed to the public of the borough benefitting, spending public money on this scheme, and his remuneration (now apparently for 5 years) is entirely inappropriate.
I am sure that you will agree, given your obvious concerns.
It is a worry and obviously troubling enough to keep you awake at night hence the time of your original email; but I have to say I do understand and that this kind of issue, related to Wirral Council, has also caused me some sleepless nights.
Yours sincerely
Dr Robert B Smith

6 thoughts on “Eulogy for Jimbo

  1. If Liptrot is still nursing a grudge and feeling undervalued by his owners and controllers at the top of the crooked Wirral cabal, there’s an opportunity just come up in the smoke to dish the dirt against the public’s favourite strikers and protestors – junior doctors.

    With a salary of £2,500 per week to stick the knife into young struggling medics, it seems the only doctors Jeremy Hunt values are spin doctors.

  2. G’day The Lord of wirral

    Small w deliberately.

    So with the demise of “Crapapple” another that must have been all over Wirral “Funny” Bizz knocking off about £2,000,000.00 like “The Pretend Friend” enjoying a ewe.

    So the list of people co-conspiring and colluding and still in post is getting shorter, so, is Ecca a quiet achiever? Ridding wirral of the crass, crud and crap.

    Invest (in thyself) Wirral

    AdderleyDadderleyDooLally (sort of gone but not receiving just desserts)

    “The Chamber Potty” (not getting as many photo shoots hence my dunny wall being only half papered)

    “The Garbage Lady” (where she deserves to be in the shit)

    The Clowncil

    Beverley Edwards (found the AdderleyDadderleyDooLally et al Lockwood/Harbac asset stripping had to go) A good one that they had to get shot of.

    Dave Garry (wrote a report that was a crock of shit and received about £40,000.00 for his trouble/loyalty)

    “Crapapple” (the main bus driver to the pub and token joke of a main man in The Fudge It and Risk It Mis-Management Committee)

    Norman (gone)

    Wilkie (gone)

    Burge(rwith the lot plus 29 mistakes in 7 second)ss

    The only dross left My Lordsville that “The Spotty, Blinking CEO” has to deal with now is

    “The Shyster” and his ill legal department.

    “Legweak” at least 18 times acting CEO without being able to do it.

    “The Pretend Friend”

    “The Pretend Friend’s Missus bilong him “Nurse Rat” who “Highbrow” told first and they were both appalled. ha ha

    “Phil the Very Very Deluded Dill”


    Oh and lets not forget “Humpty Dumpty” who stood up and lied in public along side Burgess and AdderleyDadderleyDooLally.



    Lordy, lest we forget


    That is every one of the 65 My Lord 66 excluding Stuart Kelly.


  3. You insensitive bastards! I feel sorry for the fella. I do! I mean there’s nothing worse than having your sleep disturbed through worry. This fella couldn’t sleep and at 2.35am, long before Dawn, this lad tippy toed downstairs, or up, I’ve no idea where he was during this period of insomnia, and reached out to our Leaks Doctor begging for help. So much for confidentiality!
    There’s nothing worse than worry to disturb your sleep. Many is the time I’ve woken up in a hot sweat terrified that my wife and tormentor of forty one years has checked the search history on my laptop to discover what I’m watching up in my attic and then being confronted with the clear and unambiguous evidence that I love women.
    I do! I feel sorry for the fella just as I would feel sorry for the runt of a litter of mongrel dogs. The little one. The one who can’t quite reach its mothers teat. The one with its bent and broken tail, it’s rear offside leg clubbed or even missing, the rejection from its siblings which seems to be the case here and the clear presence of fleas around its neck that requires a much needed flea collar to bring some comfort and sleep to the poor beast that’s been cast aside and left alone sat in its own piss and excrement wondering, ‘why fucking me’.

  4. And if this lad, discarded and cast aside by those who once threw for him and allowed him to run and fetch, ever seeks me out begging me to offer him some words of comfort because he can’t bloody sleep, he’ll get a very different response from me. Rather than tell the reading World that he can’t sleep, perhaps has fleas or some other unpleasant ailment that prevents slumber I’ll keep our exchanges confidential. That’s the way to win trust from any patient and anyone who thinks otherwise disagrees with me.
    What’s more, if the lad pops down here, scurries up my drainpipe, begins tapping on the window howling during the hours of darkness, ‘I need to sleep’, I’ll hurtle out of bed and shout, ‘I’m coming buddy and I’m here to help you sleep’. Course, because I didn’t open the bloody double glazed window that’s insulated to block out sound, he wouldn’t have heard me would he. I should have opened the window before the consultation began.
    So, this time, I’d open the window and say, ‘I’m here buddy and I’m here to help you sleep’ and before the fella started moaning and bloody groaning and completely bugger get up my nights sleep, I’d quickly take out my mallet that’s normally used to defend myself from my aggressive wife and belt his knuckles causing him to fall.
    That terrible drop aided by earthly gravity would ensure that this insomniac and deeply troubled fella who’s recently become fixated on furnishings to offices he can no longer get access into, should, if he falls just right, get all the sleep he needs to become refreshed and enjoy his day wandering around Buckingham Palace Gardens meeting the Queen.

  5. Pingback: Crabby : Guilty as Charged | Wirralleaks

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