The Leaky Awards 2016


No disrespect to the local worthies who voluntarily undertake good deeds ,  but we have a natural aversion at Leaky Towers to honours and awards given to people who either have :  a)  made a lot of money ( well, it’s no trick to make a lot of money… if what you want to do is make a lot of money….) or b) achieved riches and recognition for doing something they love ( while everyone else tediously toils away in jobs they hate with people they loathe just so they don’t end up living on the street).

Patronage for peerages has brought the awards system into total disrepute and we doff our hereditary ermine trimmed coronet to the increasing number who have turned down the tawdry badge of dishonour that the New Year’s Honours List has become.

We have three words on the subject of honours: “Sir” Jimmy Savile.

We have three words on the subject of awards : Most Improved Council.

Therefore we consider the annual Leaky Awards the natural antidote to the sordid status quo and rejoice in the fact that the awards that we bestow at Wirral Leaks are much more representative of the charlatans who run the show than the complicit smiley celebrities and their gleaming gewgaws.

Awards Award – ….and the winner is the Wirral Chamber of Commerce. Awards ceremonies appear to be the entire rationale for this empire building, family-run organisation. Whilst it appears to be a mere excuse for pouting Paula Basnett to buy another frock and flaunt the spray tan we need to remember the public grants and public properties that come their way and ask ourselves do we really want the non-elected personal empire building Basnett clan running a never-ending awards show at public expense?

Labour Councillor of the Year – This is obviously an inaugural award as in previous years this would be an oxymoron (or in some cases – just moron) . However this year we’d like to offer the award jointly to  Cllr Anita Leech and Cllr Christina Muspratt for annoying  fellow Labour councillors Foulkesy and Matron McLaughlin respectively. The former did so by casting the deciding vote at a recent Planning Committee whilst a clearly agitated Foulkesy laid the foundation for a potential appeal by questioning the planning process (see Campaign of the Year below). This is staggering hypocrisy coming from someone who has regularly circumvented due process in the name of managing his (bad) reputation.But then Foulkesy has built an entire political  career on being hardfaced and shameless so this should come as no surprise to anyone. Meanwhile Muspratt was the inspiration behind a tetchy display from McLaughlin as the latter tried to shut down Muspratt for trying to hold council officers to account over their failure to appraise staff. However as we know this is not how the Matron rolls – personal loyalties to officers will always take precedence over public accountability.

Quote of the year  – “From the brink of intervention, to the pinnacle of local government” (Eric Robinson CEO Wirral Council). Now we don’t know whether Stressed Eric has been buying some powerful hallucinogenics with his megabucks salary but this can surely be the only explanation for this ludicrous claim that Wirral Council is the pinnacle of local government. When it comes to public service peak performance we’re talking more Moel Famau than Mount Everest!

Runner-up : ” It might seem an unusual step to revert to a printed product, and even I queried this at first …….” (Eric Robinson talking about Wirral Council’s decision to publish Wirral View ) “Until I was told to get back under my desk ….”  he might of added to prove once again why he’s the perfect CEO for Wirral Council.

Publication of the year –  Wirral Council  yawn-fest Wirral View . Having seemingly failed to a) attract advertisers  b) sort out its distribution problems or c) address anyone’s ‘information deficit’ this award is in recognition of the fact that Wirral View could soon become a collector’s item .We advise those who’ve actually received a copy should retrieve it from the cat’s litter tray or the budgie’s cage , as with the threat of central government intervention hanging over it it may not be around for  much longer!

Runner up – Cllr Tony Jones’ (aka Tones) election publication which broke election rules by failing to show name of agent, candidate or printer on the leaflet.  As one of our eagle-eyed readers has pointed out Tones does not seem to have learned any lessons from this faux pas as strangely he is the only one of Wirral Council’s 66 councillors whose council email contact details are not included with the Council mugshots in Wirral View. Campaign Fail  

Campaign of the Year –  ‘Save our Greenbelt – Say NO to the Firestation’  campaign may, thanks ultimately to the casting vote of  Cllr Leech than the campaigning local Conservatives , halted plans to build a fire station on green belt land in Saughall Massie.

However it will be interesting to see if Merseyside Fire & Rescue Service submit an appeal whether this continuing fight ends up being thwarted by powerful interests as was the ill fated Save Girtell Court campaign.

Similar can be said of the Stop Hoylake Golf Resort campaign who are arguably up against even more powerful interests as Wirral Council attempt a ‘money no object’ bid to ensure even more Wirral green belt is sacrificed to enable a housing development in the guise of a ‘golf resort’ to go ahead.

We’ll be following both campaigns in 2017 with great interest.

Picture of the year


There is so much going on in this picture than ‘Jezza Makes Pizza For Starving Mites’. The supporting cast – Frank Field MP , Cllr McLaughlin, Cllr Meaden , Margaret Greenwood MP makes for fascinating viewing if we consider the various political intrigues,allegiances and betrayals that occurred throughout 2016 . However what intrigues us most on the right of the picture , ‘recording’ events for posterity, is the presence of ‘Person C’ . Adding further intrigue to the local political scene we understand the former political editor of the Liverpool Echo and reluctant witness in the Wirralgate saga has, for reasons unknown, apparently ceased working for the council’s favoured external publication ……….


5 thoughts on “The Leaky Awards 2016

  1. Enjoyed your awards for public disservice…..Cllr Tony Jones (aka Tones) should also be given an award for his role in buggering up New Brighton Lifeboat Station. Remember he was, and still is, Chairman of said station.

    Support the sacked crew!

  2. G’day Leaks

    HAPPY 2017

    “Phil the Very Very Very Very Slimy, Elusive and Deluded Dill” how about a fresh start and fess up on Wirral “Funny” Bizz and all your lies and obfuscations?



    Have you written to “Highbrow” yet or is that a lie in progress.

    You just can’t help yourself can you you peanut.

    Luv and Respect to you and yours Lordsville XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

  3. And a Happy New Year to everyone. Course, deep bloody down, way beneath the marrow of y’er bones you just know it’s not going to be. More likely, if the bloody Council and the hierarchy have their way, it’ll be a daily kick in the knackers, a quick shifty through your bloody diminishing funds that you lovingly secrete in your bloody purse or wallet just in case you need to eat, a day on your lap top when you know that the bloody Council are having a good peep at your browsing history that they’ve got authority to monitor because some oily twat in a suit decided that you, your house and all associated with you merit a RIPA application that labels ‘you’ as a twat and a corporate terrorist and, if that ain’t enough, some fat, short haired yellow bellied Council wannabe is scouring your bloody recycling bin in the hope that they’ll find something that was once yours has been discarded by you in the wrong rotten bin, thus entitling them to sanction you with a dreary letter threatening to cut off your utilities unless you ‘pay us your money’ because you failed to recycle properly and because of bloody you, you alone and your bloody reckless actions, two square metres of ice melted on some far away glacier as a direct result of you causing the good old Earth to warm up by half a bloody degree.
    Is that enough? No it bloody isn’t. Then, whilst your minding your own business holed up in your family home pondering which supermarket skip you should rummage through later that day when darkness falls because you want bread that’s out of date, the bloody letter box rattles, your loved ones produce to you The Wirral View, which results in you screaming, ‘gather the rope together, tie, tether, and securely bind me firmly to me chair, hide the cutlery so that I can’t stab myself and show me the bastard pages of Liptrot and Macullum’s shiny, happy, clappy, it’s good to be alive and hugely expensive bucket of bollocks that intended to spoon feed me the corporate tripe and pigswill that I’m obliged to have spoon fed into my ailing self via my fat face.

  4. Anita Leech played a blinder by putting ‘the right thing’ before party loyalty. I hope her conscience doesn’t cost her dearly at the hands of the rest of her colleagues who seem to have lost any remote trace of a conscience filter – unless it comes via warning letter from central government.

  5. Hi Wirral Leaks

    Another award you might consider for next time…this next year will be no different, so why not engrave the recycled plastic cup?

    The Award for ‘The Most Frequently Recycled Council Bo**cks’ goes to ……………..Cllr Phil Davies of Wirral Council

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