More Good Advice – Top Ten Tips For Tentative Trots

 

Top Ten Tips

Our readers have  rightly brought to our attention that we missed a trick with our Good Advice story as we all know that the most useful piece of advice that any local Labour politician wanting to remain in public office on Wirral can receive at the moment is to publicly pledge allegiance to Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn.

Although @ronnieabbey1 is pure comedy gold we’d like to help prospective Labour councillors to avoid having a post- deselection public meltdown on Twitter .

Screen Shot 2018-11-07 at 17.24.08

So here’s our cut out and keep ‘Top Ten Tips For Tentative Trots’ advising how the politically ambitious can ensure that the allowances, expenses and lucrative gigs on outside bodies can continue during this difficult time of political upheaval ( i.e. Cllr Steve ‘Foulkesy’ Foulkes)

1  Buy some Jeremy Corbyn memorabilia ,a t-shirt , a mug , an oven glove, a ‘Jez We Can’ baseball cap .  Just make sure that whatever you purchase wasn’t made in a third world sweat shop by a 9 year old earning less in a day than your monthly Labour Party subscription ( £4.17) . Indeed we understand that until he stopped going to Birkenhead Constituency Labour Party meetings Frank Field was delighted to see so many Labour Party members wearing ‘I JC’ t-shirts until  he realised that they were not on the path to spiritual enlightenment but exhibiting the first signs of Jezzamania , leading him to comment  : ‘He’s not the messiah, he’s a very naughty boy’ !

2  Acquaint yourself with that quaint old ideology known as ‘Socialism’.  Try not to get it confused with ‘National Socialism’ . Know your ‘Das Kapital’  from your ‘Mein Kampf’! We don’t want any more racist incidents involving local Labour party members do we?!

3  Study the works of Marx and no, we don’t mean watching ‘Duck Soup’ or ‘A Day at The Races’ on the Sky Cinema Greats channel !

4  Have your photograph taken wearing your ‘I JC’  t-shirt and ‘Jez we Can’ baseball cap (preferably at a foodbank, on a picket line or wiv da yoof ) and get it printed on your election leaflet.

5 Use the word ‘comrade’ as often as you can especially when communicating with the lumpenproletariat*  ( i.e. Foulkesy)

6 Stand in front of the mirror with a hairbrush (or if your folliclely challenged – a rolled up copy of the Morning Star) and practice chanting “Oh Jeremy Corbyn…” to the White Stripes tune ‘Seven Nation Army’

7 When approached by the media to comment on the Frank Field withdrawal from the party whip  situation reply : ” Never heard of him … was he the one that sang ‘She Taught Me How To Yodel’ ?

Listen we know Field gets bloody everywhere but it’s important that you adopt a Stalinist approach on the subject. So despite the fact that many a time he got you out of trouble of your own making you must make every attempt to erase the last 39 years from history (i.e. Foulkesy) . Frank Ifield may have sang ” I Remember You” but when it comes to Frank Field you don’t ! – got it?

8 Emphasize your working class background by mentioning in your election leflet that you once went to Maccy D’s in your pyjamas but didn’t much like it as you were shocked to discover that ‘smashed avocado on sourdough’ wasn’t a menu option

 Emphasize your revolutionary credentials by letting people know that you might possibly go and see the new Mike Leigh film ‘Peterloo’ –  the story of the 1819 Peterloo Massacre where British forces attacked a peaceful pro-democracy rally in Manchester – but only if  ‘Mamma Mia 2’ is no longer showing.

10 Finally, the most contemporary way to show both your political devotion and guarantee your political survival would be to get a Jeremy Corbyn tattoo. A temporary one obviously …

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8 thoughts on “More Good Advice – Top Ten Tips For Tentative Trots

  1. G’day Lordy

    Woke up feeling angry 7 years on.

    Hey… “Philly “FUCKING” Liar” we are still, me and “Highbrow” waiting for our public apology as Wirral “Funny” Bizz £2,000,000.00 knock off whistleblowers.

    All very well paying “Highbrow’s” court costs of £10,000.00 + behind closed doors when you got a super duper barrister down the small claims court so he couldn’t win.

    Shit bag.

    You and your aresehole mates

    Davies
    Jones
    Jones
    Foulkes
    Armstrong
    Adderley
    Basnett
    Bradbury
    Tour
    Wilkie
    Crapapple
    Williamson
    Doughty
    Norman
    Abbey
    et al

    Shit all over us just for telling you £2,000,000.00 of “NOT YOUR MONEY” was being knocked off.

    Ooroo

    James

    What did your cabal do?

    Continued to pay the thieves for a further 18 months.

    Why should we still feel guilty when you let them away to Portugal and took the keystone cops off them.

    Feel much better now Lordy for talking to you. XXXXXXXXXXXX

    C’mon the decent people at wirral you will feel much better if you talk to Leaky about the shitbags masquerading as decent citizens.

  2. Tee hee. Lovin’ it.

    Somebody should tell Ron Abbey, or maybe it’s too late?

    But Ron, if you want to be consistent with your accusations about peeps breaking Labour Party rules, get onto Moira McLaughlin.

    When she was a Labour Councillor she was regularly retweeting the desperate bleatings of an Independent MP who answers to the name Frank Field!

    Surely that’s a serious breach of policy?

    Ron? Ron?!

  3. G’day Leaksly

    I would love “Philly “FUCKING” Liar”, before his public apology to the Wirral “Funny” Bizz £2,000,000.00 knock off whistleblowers, to explain why he got a heavyweight barista and friendly judge down at the small claims court and beat the shit out of “Highbrow” and then pay his £10,000.00 costs when he was claiming damages of £5,000.00?

    How often has he done this sort of shit with “NOT HIS MONEY”?

    Ooroo

    James

    “The Pretend Friend” is just a big an arsehole.

    Just thought I would add that and pity his other half(wit) “Missus Bilong “The Pretend Friend” Nurse Rat”

    Luv yer La XXXXXXXXXX

  4. G’day Leaky

    My top 10 wirral p**** TIPS

    Tour
    Adderley
    Basnett
    Burgess
    Armstrong
    Ball
    Bradbury
    Jones
    Jones
    Foulkes

    and the rest of the B*** B**

    Doughty
    Abbot
    Williamson
    Wilkie
    Norman

    and of course

    “Philly “FUCKING” Liar”

    and

    His Ugly Twin Brother with the Comb Over from Hell

    Ooroo

    James

    When that lot goes Lordy the IQ will go up, the decency level will go up….

    I’m bored now

    but luv you more than ever XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

  5. We can only guess what the Labour Party will do to Mr Abbey about this vicious attack?? Yes nothing!!
    It appears the national Labour Party have departed and abandoned Wirral.

    This entire situation is a joke!!

    So let’s predict who’s next to jump to independant??
    Here’s my list of right wingers who could jump, well hopefully they jump cause they are useless
    George Davies
    Steve Foulkes
    Bernie Mooney
    Brian Kenny
    Paul Stewart
    Janette Williamson
    Chris Spriggs
    Angela Davies
    Stuart Witless
    Gillian Woods
    Julie McManus
    Aidrian Jones
    Chris Jones

    It’s time to get this lot out

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