Love ACTUALLY

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Here’s what’s ACTUALLY going to happen to the Vue cinema site bought by council for £7m

This is what’s ACTUALLY going to happento Vue cinema site bought by council for £7m

We continue our series of commenting further on this week’s news stories by asking you to spot the difference between these two reports published yesterday in the Liverpool Echo and the Wirral Globe  

Our first comment was that we loved the use of ACTUALLY ,  in UPPERCASE – the written equivalent on standing with your hands on your hips and saying we know better than you,ner,ner,ner,ner,ner…

Although ACTUALLY we don’t think ACTUALLY is the right word here as it refers to the truth and the facts of a situation not the usual Wirral Council pipedream.

However what we didn’t love was the further erosion of local press plurality as BBC funded ‘Local Democracy Reporter’, Tom ‘Media’ Houghton , provides an official BBC approved version of the local news which follows a familiar pattern of the same story being a big splash in the Liverpool Echo before becoming a little ripple in the  Wirral Globe .

Clearly this was Wirral’s finger-wagging riposte to the negative response from commentators and bloggers to the press announcement earlier in the week that Wirral Council had bought Vue cinema for £7 million and which we reported in our  Birkenhead – A Tomb with a Vue  post.

Luckily for Wirral Council there was a fearless ‘Local Democracy Reporter’ at hand ( or more accurately on the receiving the end of an email from the Wirral Council Press Office) to put the record straight ( or rather unquestioningly publish some quick copy and a picture from the photo library) .

The MSM message being : ‘Oh no you nay-sayers and doubters, cash -strapped Wirral Council, who are reknowned for their business acumen, haven’t spent £7 million on a fleapit ! Nay,nay and thrice nay we’ve paid £7 million to demolish it!…’

Well, that’s alright then!…and what’s more they’re going to replace it with artist’s impressions. Lots of ’em – and they’ll all be dutifully published in the Liverpool Globe and then the Wirral Echo or the the other way round  – we get confused!

As to whether these artist’s impressions ACTUALLY happen is open to question but we’re going to put this out there – and it may surprise you but we think they just might! However looking at some of the councillors who would be involved in making the decisions , particularly the Cabinet Member for Housing & Planning and the Chair of the Planning Committee, we wouldn’t be surprised if it was ACTUALLY as dodgy AF…

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4 thoughts on “Love ACTUALLY

  1. It wasn’t so long ago that Councils would take the time and the trouble to dress things up. Yes, it was absolute bollocks and we all knew it was bollocks, and made absolutely no fiscal sense at all, but at least they’d make an effort, feeble as it was, to mitigate whatever it was they were doing with public money in order to placate the noisy ones and try and shut them up.

    Upon the Wirral, the new Eldorado and the land of opportunity, where the rules of sane and good fiscal governance no longer seen to apply, they don’t even bother nowadays. They simply buy an old flea pit, fork out seven million quid and then tell you diddlysquit about why they spent the money and what their future intentions are.

    In days gone by they might have claimed this’ll save you millions, it’ll create hundreds of jobs, it’s good business practice, smart thinking and together, if we all tip up to support the idea, we’ll flog a thousand choc ices during the intermission.

    My lads an economist. He’s a good lad who works in the City of London. Where he got his brains from I’ve no idea. But, from time to time I sit him down and ask him about the Wirral. I ask him, because I’m keen to know what’s going on and why. because I’m keen to understand how madness can seemingly become accepted as normal cognitive behaviour.

    His usual response to my inquisitive nature, and particularly the acquisition of the Cinema is no different to any other fiscal issue I put to him, is ‘I’ve no idea what WBC are thinking’. Furthermore, regarding the seven million quid spent on a Cinema, his explanation was quite telling. He explained that the only reason a Council would purchase a Cinema at a time when Cinemas ain’t doing so well and everyone has access to Netflix and immediate downloads, is the Council must have discovered a ten foot thick seam of Gold Ore to be found only a few feet beneath its creaky foundations.

    If you think it madness, it looks like madness and your deep down gut instinct tells you it’s madness, then the chances are it is madness and not for the last time the people of the Wirral peninsular have been short changed again because of some cunning and guile employed to make a few a little wealthier than they once were before they got lucky getting a seat at the table playing a game of Lucky Outcomes with the local Council.

  2. Here is what’s ACTUALLY happening…

    WBC can’t run the Floral Pavilion theater any more because its costing circa £900,000 a year to keep open, so we’ll find some mug to take it off our hands on a long term lease. (See item 5)
    https://democracy.wirral.gov.uk/documents/g7392/Public%20reports%20pack%2026th-Nov-2018%2010.00%20Cabinet.pdf?T=10

    So lets buy a cinema for £7m instead.
    Sorry no, its probably the most expensive piece of building land on Merseyside!

    As for little Tom, I thought he was taken on as a local democracy reporter. A quick trawl through his Wirral Globe articles shows he is more obsessed with fast food outlets than reporting about local democracy.

    https://www.wirralglobe.co.uk/news/17412779.plans-submitted-for-huge-drive-thru-coffee-shop-in-wirral-retail-park/
    https://www.wirralglobe.co.uk/news/17370494.mcdonalds-drive-thru-planned-for-prenton/
    https://www.wirralglobe.co.uk/news/17348726.disgusting-images-inside-mice-ridden-chinese-takeaway/

    I could go on.

    • An honest young person becoming a local journalist is like an honest young person becoming a police officer.

      It’s going to go one way or the other. He or she quickly has the scales torn from their eyes and realises that to prosper as a copper, they will need to lie in court and beat people up. Or as a journo, trot out strings of lies in their actual, factual newspaper stories, simper and brown nose in order to continue paying the mortgage and feeding their family.

      The real ones fuck off out of there and are relieved to sign onto JSA.

      The fakes stay, bed themselves in, decide to see it out and make the best of it. The successful ones who “get on” and become editors develop into two-faced fucking socio-psychopaths. The unsuccessful ones get bullied and / or forgotten.

      I think Tom won’t be around for much longer. Because he’s a good boy and he will make the right decision. One which will preserve his goodness, his sanity and his humanity.

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