Advent Farewell 18 – Satan’s Little Helper

Satan's Little Helper

Birkenhead MP Frank Field is frequently presented in the media as some kind of modern day saint. We have frequently begged to differ on his venerable status . Believe us –  he ain’t no saint . He may not be Satan either but referring to him thus allows us to redress the balance somewhat .

More specifically for the purposes of this post it helps us refer to Frankenfield’s electoral agent and folliclely challenged factotum Cllr George Davies as Satan’s Little Helper. Frankenfield’s very own Igor – ever willing to attend to his master’s bidding , no matter how unlawful , unethical or immoral . Give us the dirt we’ll give you the money , you can write it yourself . Make it up – we don’t mind .Just make sure you sign it . 

Marty F IgorGeorge as Igor

Cruel?

Life can be cruel,especially for some people who live in Birkenhead. As Frankenfield wants the world and her husband to know. Here he is in today’s Guardian (which has been sent to us by several readers) wallowing in other people’s poverty and wringing every last crocodile tear from his tawdry handkerchief . Once again doing our  Advent Farewell 7 – Frank Field’s Permanent Bank Holiday   story to death and proving once again to be a supreme sentimentalist who wants to have the luxury of an emotion without paying for it. If you have the (empty) stomach for it here is the latest instalment Hunger in Wirral: the truth behind the tale that made a Tory MP cry

Read Frankenfield described thus : immaculate in a checked shirt and tank top as he surveyed a scene of organised chaos in a sports hall at the Hive youth centre. Around him, volunteers scurried hither and thither to fill Christmas hampers for Wirral’s most needy.

In parliament, Field, who speaks in the perfect grammar of a patrician, had told the Commons it was the first time he had been able to tell the funeral story without crying himself.

A deity in a tank top? It might be a Guardianista hipster thing but we would have thought that a tank top would have been anathema – even in Birkenhead.

And there’s more :

Had anyone told him in 1979, when he became an MP, that he would be spending the run-up to Christmas packing hampers for constituents who couldn’t even afford toilet paper, he would have disregarded them as mad. “I would have gently had them put in a strait-jacket. I would have taken them to lie down in a dark-filled room.”

Can we have less of Frankenfield’s dark fantasies?  And anyway we’ve heard it all before, everyone gets disregarded as ‘mad’ if they don’t comply with his warped world view. Perhaps next time he’s telling Wirral Council leader Cllr Phil ‘Power Boy Pip’ Davies what to do he can ask him if his constituents can’t even afford toilet paper how can they can fucking afford to pay for the Hoylake Golf Resort?

Mental-PowerBoy