We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again and that some things on Wirral are beyond satire or parody. Take for example this announcement :
Operation Sparkle, organised by Birkenhead Improvement District (BID) team, aims to ensure that a local area is tidied, made cleaner and attractive for all.
Full story here : Operation Sparkle
Yes, you read that right Operation Sparkle. What bright spark at the Wirral Chamber of Commerce offshoot BID (for it is they) who come up with that shiny euphemism for turdpolishing? Could it have been ‘one of the leading figures on Wirral’ BID head, Gemma ‘Who She’ Nichols who says :
By tackling issues of fly-tipping, litter and graffiti we are making places more attractive by planting flowers, painting street furniture, lampposts and improving shop frontages. We will continue visiting areas in need of this support, the BID is here to make a difference and this is something we are all very committed to continue in making a real difference to Birkenhead.
We work with closely with voluntary groups, Birkenhead Constituency, the Probation Service and many businesses to pinpoint key target areas and also involve the community in making Birkenhead a better place to live, work and visit.
The reaction has been very positive to the changes made and we are very determined that Operation Sparkle, and our other initiatives are productive.
Might we suggest a more likely source is Wirral Chamber of Commerce CEO ‘Princess’ Paula Basnett who inevitably chips in :
I would certainly urge people to help in in whatever way they can by volunteering just a few hours of their time to get involved and make Operation Sparkle a lasting success.
Coincidentally the pictures that accompany this blog post were sent to us last week and suggest Operation Sparkle needs to wave its magic wand. The pictures came with the following comments :
It’s like a shantytown you couldn’t make it up!If I operated a business that was charged a levy on top of its business rates which in turn is handed to the Chamber outfit, I’d be far from happy
We appreciate that some people may criticise our sneerin’ and a snipin’ from the sidelines about volunteers who just want to make Birkenhead a better place.We’re quite happy to own that criticism (much like how we used to own Egerton House, Pacific Rd, The Lauries etc;etc;). Moreover we’ll slither off the chaise longue and be on the next flight from Nice airport to deal with other people’s detritus the day that Princess Paula dons the sequinned hi-vis and marabou-trimmed Marigolds and gets down and dirty on the mean streets of Birkenhead. Her Ladyship thinks that such an act of selfless volunteering would be something akin to the time that hissy-fit fashionista Naomi Campbell did Community Service… and watching this report we see what she means . Operation Sparkle indeed!